When we were teens, my brother and I used to pluck mangoes “illegally” from a neighbour’s compound.
We were not the only culprits, other teens in the neighbourhood did, too. When the mango season was due, we would go and pelt two particular trees with stones, again and again.
Year after year, it was noticeable. Anytime we barged into that compound, it was the same two trees that took the beating. The others stood there as though they didn’t exist.
One fateful day, I asked my elder brother why we always threw stones at those trees and not the others. He sighed, “Well, the other trees are not fruitful. Why waste our time on them? Only good trees are pelted!”
Indeed, only good trees are pelted. Only fruitful trees are stoned. No sane person goes harvesting from a tree that bears nothing.
I have come to learn this simple principle of life: if people attack you at the slightest opportunity, it means, at least, that you are yielding fruit of some sort.
No one wastes time on fruitless people. On a normal day, nobody picks a quarrel with a madman. No one pelts stones at a mud house!
Today, the stones have changed shape. They come as anonymous posts, quote-tweets, screenshots without context, and “just asking questions” threads.
They come as WhatsApp statuses with your name carefully left out, but everyone knows who it is about.
They come as voice notes forwarded to groups you didn’t even know existed. The stones are faster now and louder. But the principle has not changed.
The tree under attack is still the tree with fruit.
Know that you need sense to take nonsense. Know which battles to fight and which to let pass. Some battles are needless, and they will only smear your integrity.
Some opposition comes with your position. Some hurdles only appear when you reach new levels. And it is because you are a good tree.
When such hindrances come, do not fret. Do not step into the mud to fight pigs. They will get dirty, but they have nothing to lose. You do.
Petty people will lure you into the mud, whether in a comment section or a heated group chat, and then whip you with experience. Ignore them.
Always remember: only good trees are pelted. Only fruitful people live under criticism, both constructive and destructive.
Good people are showered with accusations and what-have-you. Why? Because they are good. They have fruit to lose, while others have absolutely nothing.
When people talk behind your back, it simply means you are ahead of them. It means you have a dash of gold on the inside. It is insane to throw stones at a dead tree. So don’t take it too hard. It is a sign, at least, that you are a good tree.
Focus your energy on the right people. Redirect your passion to the right things. As long as you bear fruit, stones will fly. As long as you are making something good of your life, someone will find an opportunity to stab you in the back, and often in the dark.
Ignore. Don’t fight them. Don’t waste your breath. Don’t post a long explanation. Don’t even apologise. You owe no one an apology for being the good you. Besides, only good trees are pelted!
Others have a way of getting on our nerves. As long as we work in human institutions and don’t live solitary lives, people will jab us for no reason.
We will be misjudged. Our kind acts will be painted as selfish schemes.
They will wish for our failure. When we stumble, they will pray that we never rise again. But in all of this, know that it comes with being a good tree. Only good trees are pelted!
Take all the accusations and lies thrown at you in good faith. See them as battles that come with being not just you, but a good you.
Don’t cheapen your value by fighting them. Let them go. Kings fight prominent battles, not petty ones. And a king does not need the last word in the replies.
When you hear the rumours and hearsay, don’t let them weigh you down. Don’t be moved by another person’s petty stones.
People throw stones at glass houses to see whether they will break. Be that stone-proof glass house. Give pettiness no attention.
Inasmuch as you keep yielding fruit, stones will be pelted at you. And guess what? The more we plucked the mangoes, the more those trees bore.
Good trees don’t lose their productivity when they are stoned. So don’t lose your good taste. Don’t lose your kindness. Don’t lose your big heart.
Keep giving love for hatred. Keep sowing goodness for others’ evil. Wish them well. There is no revenge as sweet as heaping coals of kindness on the heads of those who wished us evil.
Don’t break down because of unfounded allegations. Only good trees are pelted. Make a bold decision to sieve what gets to your heart and what stops at your ears.
The writer is the Chief Scribe of Scribe Productions (www.scribeproductions.com) and Scribe Communications (www.scribecommltd.com)
