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Real reasons men go "poof"

We’re revealing the main reasons why a guy will just disappear after a few dates – with no explanation!

• Two dates isn't a relationship: Two pleasant evenings on the town may not entitle you to an explanation of his future romantic aspirations. 

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You’re not having a relationship yet. You’re spending a couple hours together talking and perhaps kissing. Don’t feel slighted if a man you barely know doesn’t call and explain himself.

• We don’t want to destroy you with a personality critique: There is a school of thought that says, “If a man goes poof, Who Cares Why?” You’ve already learned the only important fact – he doesn’t want to be with you. 

Do you really want a hard look at the reasons? Are you itching for a personality critique? What if he says, “You have bad skin. You talk about yourself too much, and you are a terrible kisser.” 

Maybe he disappeared because he doesn’t want to end up crushing your self-esteem in an awkward conversation.

• The reason is too embarrassing and we’re bad liars: Sometimes men pass on a great woman because they’ve met 1) a more convenient woman, 2) a more sexually available woman, 3) a better-looking woman, 4) a woman their friends like more. 

Explaining to you that you’re great, but we’d like to be with a better endowed woman is, frankly, a little embarrassing. 

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This puts us in the position of having to lie when you ask, “Why are you leaving?!” Some men are good liars and some are not.

• Because we know you’ve heard, “It’s me, not you,” a million times: It’s really the only thing we can say. “You’re great. I’m terrible. You’re going to find a great guy. 

I don’t deserve you. I’m just not in a place right now where I feel comfortable in a relationship. You’re such a catch.” 

On and on and on and on. Do you really want to sit through that conversation?

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• We have a misguided notion about the modern age of dating: Some men think, “Haven’t we moved past all that old fashioned junk?” We text instead of chatting on the phone. We post updates on Facebook instead of meeting our friends. 

Everything is casual now and disconnected from the rules of the past. Who has the inclination to get face-to-face (or voice-to-voice) and have some old-fashioned break-up talk?

• We’re leaving because we’re scared of how great you are: Men who are scared of commitment will sometimes date four women they are lukewarm about rather than dating one women they really have feelings for. 

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It’s a safety mechanism. Any woman who starts to stir real feelings gets the boot. Try explaining that one. So, Poof!

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