Good & Healthy Relationship Advice & Tips

Plenty of movies and men’s magazines trade on the idea that the hyper-masculine “manly man” is what makes women swoon, but when you ask actual women what they find attractive, you'll find a lot of unlikely, cute or straight-up weird answers that veer away from what’s traditionally considered sexy in a man.

What women like in men is as varied and individual as each of us is, of course, but certain themes tend to emerge when women are given the mic to discuss what we’re really into.

Here are 13 things you didn't realise that women find super hot in men:

When you pay attention to how you dress: There’s a stale trope that men can throw on any old thing that’s vaguely clean and be good to go but it’s clear that tons of women are turned on by the very opposite. Men who pay careful attention to their presentation are devastatingly sexy.

When you play with her hair: Having your hair touched feels SO good! Having it played with is like an intimate, at-home version of a head massage, and plenty of women find that irresistible.

When you say "you're right" without a qualifier: Everyone appreciates having a discussion with someone who can concede a point without getting babyish and defensive about it, and women are no exception. Men who are graceful conversationalists are in high demand amongst women.

When you're good in the kitchen: Some women like a man who can whip up a fancy signature dish, and others are happy with smaller gestures, like a simple breakfast or great cup of coffee.

When you can acknowledge other good-looking guys: Men who can talk about other men being attractive without squirming like a sunburnt worm about it. There’s something firmly appealing about a man who is secure enough in who he is that he can recognise when another man has it going on.

When you love animals: Speaking to an animal in a funny voice (“Nyawww, you’re a widdle puppy!”) may strike you as a bizarre thing for women to find sexy, but we’re just reporting the facts here, and men who are goofy and gentle with pets immediately increase their attractiveness levels.

When you grab a condom (without being asked): Men who take sexual health seriously without whining, pressuring or dragging their heels are overwhelmingly sexy. It means you're not trying to put the responsibility for the sexual health of everyone in the relationship on her.

When you dance (even if it's kinda goofy): A lot of men are scared to dance because they know they’re no Usher or JT, but men who can be playful and light-hearted without taking themselves too seriously consistently find favour with women.

When you read: What’s not to love about a man with a healthy intellectual curiosity and interest in the inner lives of other people? Nothing.

When you smell nice: Guys: It’s not good enough to merely smell not-bad, and there are plenty of masculine scents for you to play with. Find a cologne that works on you and make it your signature scent — and watch as women start sidling closer.

When you really listen: After asking women what they find attractive, a clear turn-on emerges that outstrips almost all others: being genuinely listened to. Bonus points if you listen so intently you do the chin-hands.

When you respect people who are serving you: The appeal of this one hopefully goes without saying: It bodes well for you as a person if you treat those who serve you kindly, and that’s attractive.

When you make the bed: One household activity which is so widely favoured amongst women is watching a man make a bed. Seriously: women can’t get enough of it — so start perfecting those hospital corners.