Fact-finding fivers

As children reach the fifth year milestone, they are usually energetic and adventurous.

They are highly inquisitive and full of questions such as ‘why’.

For children whose speech and language are well developed at this age and who can also read, they are a delight.

Their desire to learn more about everything gives them an advantage over their peers.

Their curiosity is so intense at this age that parents and caregivers should deliberately use it to teach them some lifelong lessons.

Purposeful play in stimulating environments usually reveals potential.

As they say, almost all creativity involves purposeful play.

As they expend their energy, interact with other children, ask questions, and toy around with objects, their confidence grows, giving them more vim to fearlessly pursue other tasks.

By this age, children understand that boys and girls are different.

They can accurately name body parts for both genders and give simple explanations of their functions.

The five-year-old can begin learning about sexual abuse (if not introduced earlier) and understand that it is never the child's fault.

Adults can begin to teach them about touches which are okay (comforting, pleasant and welcoming) and touches which are not okay (intrusive, uncomfortable, unwanted or painful), and how to assert themselves in that respect.

They must be taught that everyone has the right to say ‘no’ to being touched, even by grown-ups they like.

No! No one has the right to see or touch their private parts.

We cover these parts of the body for every good reason (including the breast and buttocks) and their lips.

They must understand the difference between a surprise and a secret.

Secrets are never to be disclosed, but surprises are exposed later.

There should, therefore, be no secrets kept from mum and dad.

These children must also have a safety network.

These are five trusted adults (each representing a finger of the dominant hand) who they (these fivers) agree to go to when they need someone to talk to in situations they are not okay with.

Parents and caregivers should discourage people (men, women, teachers, uncles, family friends, etc) who label young girls, especially their queens, wives, girlfriends, dearies, besties, etc. Subtle signs such as these are typical of most child abusers.

Interestingly, sexual abuse happens to both boys and girls, and both men and women of the same or opposite sex also perpetuate it.

At this age, children start noticing pregnant women and other children in families.

Many will begin asking questions about where babies come from.

Although this can make many parents uncomfortable and they may want to avoid the topic, it is important to take the opportunity to explain in simple terms how boys' and girls' bodies change as they grow, and God’s purpose for uniting man and woman, without giving too many details.

It is okay to simply tell them that babies grow in a mother's womb.

The process of birth can also be described in simple terms. 

These conversations can become very uncomfortable when parents or caregivers are caught off guard.

Parents with children aged between three and six must, therefore, prepare for this, as sexual development is a vital area that should not be overlooked or ignored.

As these children grow older and approach puberty, parents can now begin to add on more layers of age-appropriate information by telling them what to expect at puberty, how to cope with the body changes and the risks of sexual activity. 

Email:- nanaesi.gaisie@wellchildhaven.com