Social media etiquette: Making virtual engagements nice

I tend not to respond to, “hello”, “hi” “how are you?” from unknown people on social media (Facebook,  WhatsApp, etc).

Indeed, for me, just a “hi” or “hello” virtually is a put-off.

When one just sends a “hi” by whatever social medium, it seems to me that the person is lazily, virtually lurking around social media platforms, just waiting for a response before going on with a substantive message.

Growing up, I remember my father teaching me that whenever I picked a telephone to call anyone, I had to, first, introduce myself.

Thus, if I had to call President John Dramani Mahama (not the slightest chance in heaven), I would immediately say, (if, or when he picked), “Mr President, My name is Caroline Boateng. I am a journalist.”

With the introduction out of the way, I would immediately get on to the reason for calling, “Please I am calling to remind you of your brief tenure of four years and all the obligations you need to execute within that time.”

That might lead to a conversation, either brief or long, then a conclusion of me thanking him for his time with me on the phone.

That is phone manners or etiquette and it applies to engagements on mobile phones, and also most social mediums.

Social media

Social media engagements, like the antiquated telephone, which have all but faded out now, must be mastered and moderated, or no communication takes place.

That is particularly so with social media engagements, which are faceless.

Direct telephone calls or face-to-face encounters have the inflexion of the voice, physical gestures, etc., which aids in better communication.

Thus, in a chance encounter while walking, I would say “hi” with a smile or hand gesture.

Together with my posture, the other party will know immediately whether I am pressed for time and cannot linger or can linger to converse.

These are absent when communicating via social media.

It is not a face-to-face conversation with a person, thus, it is dependent on both parties to moderate and project virtual voices and activities optimally to carry out a conversation.

Record

Another disheartening social media practice is to believe that talking about someone among chat groups is ok. Associations are complex networks and one may not know who is associated with whom!

Indeed, that is not ok, and doing that gives a trail or record of one’s disparaging comments about another.

Those comments should be made in a phone conversation rather than in chats, since, if not recorded, no trail of the unkind remarks exists.

For others, too, passing on information, whether relevant or not, to every contact on their mobile phone is a pastime.

Recently, US President Donald Trump’s Defense Secretary, Pete Hegseth, was put on the spot because he carelessly shared plans of the bombing of Houthis in Yemen with Atlantic's (a magazine) editor-in-chief Jeffrey Goldberg! This week, information is that he also shared that classified information with his wife, his lawyer and other friends.

We must not take for granted the contacts on our mobile phones.

The fact that you have someone’s contact does not convey the right or permission to send that person all sorts of messages, religious, inspirational, marketing and worst of all, lotto forecasts.

(I am totally against the lotto as it pertains to Ghana.

Yes, some have had the chance and won. 

Chance had also eluded most and they have been caught in an expectation trap, expecting to win the next time and never winning.

At the end of the day, they spend all, to the point of borrowing to stake and miss the chance.

These experiences are evident in communities across the country.

Perpetually disappointed, but again, slightly ever hopeful, those who stake then tend to drink whenever the opportunity to win big eludes them.

I believe there is an information overload of inspirational and biblical quotes, lotto forecasts and unnecessary information bombarding social media.

Please, when you get someone’s mobile number, it is now part of a person’s identity that must be kept with care.

At the very least, when you keep passing on information and you realise it is not acknowledged, cease!

We must not add a contact to group messaging without express permission.

Some people love their space and may not like that!

These days, the mobile phone is not just a convenient distraction. It is an economic powerhouse in the hands used in generating wealth.

Do not just see a contact online and say “hi”; do the right thing.

The person may be very busy online and not ready for your nonchalant “hi”.

Writer’s E-mail: caroline.boateng@graphic.com.gh