Don't worry about ‘push gifts’ — Dr Boakye

Lydia Ezit Life Jul - 31 - 2025 , 14:47 5 minutes read

A Certified Marriage Counsellor, Dr John Boakye, has advised women who do not receive gifts from their partners after being delivered of babies not to be disappointed.

He said the practice of appreciating women through gifts, a practice now informally known as 'push gift', had become obsolete because, in recent times, many men are generally generous to their wives.

Dr Boakye, who was speaking to The Mirror in Accra last Thursday, said, unlike the past when husbands hardly gave their wives presents and only did so during Christmas or special occasions, men these days willingly give their wives gifts at any time.

“Push gift”

Explaining the concept, the counsellor said it was a meaningful present given to a mother by her partner to celebrate the arrival of a newborn.

“Push gift has always been there from the olden days, but these days men often give gifts. They give all the time. So when you do not get some from your husband, you do not have to worry.

Our fathers did so well with “push gifts”, such that our mothers boasted with their gifts", he added, saying: "They will show you a cloth, jewellery or some items they cherished so much and say your father gave this to me when l had you."

Dr Boakye acknowledged that even though men or husbands were doing so well in recent times they needed to make the giving of gifts a regular feature in relationships.

"Research shows that a woman will give you one mark for a big gift and one mark for a small gift. So why don’t you give her several small gifts and score many marks?” he asked.

Touching on the significance and how "push gifts" in marriages and relationships emerged, the counsellor explained that it was to communicate appreciation of the physical and emotional effort during pregnancy and childbirth, as well as the sacrifices of the woman.

Such gifts, Dr Boakye indicated, were often cherished as a symbol of love and a constant reminder of that special occasion.

Social media

Videos of "push gifts" have trended on social media, with some new mothers being surprised with decorated vehicles on their way home from maternity wards.

Others are also welcomed with hampers and other luxurious items while on their beds in maternity wards.

Some women who shared their opinions on the practice with The Mirror welcomed it, saying while many women or wives desired such gifts, they had been denied them, with the excuse that they were delivered of their babies through Caesarean Section and, therefore, did not deserve a "push gift."

A nurse, Naomi Offei, said, “I was told I did not push my baby, so l did not deserve a “push gift” from my husband”.

Some women who received some gifts were dissatisfied with the items, which they said included a blender and a washing machine.

Others said they would love to go to their husbands and claim their "push gifts", since they gave them nothing.

A number of women who spoke with The Mirror were of the view that such gifts should not be limited to the delivery of a first child.

A pharmacist, Miss Mary-Magdalene Ansong, said she had never received a "push gift" for all three children and although she would love to have them, her husband would not give.

“I would have even preferred the gift in cash, not necessarily an item,” she added.

Maame Abena, a trader in her 50s, said she received a big white sheep when she had her first child.

A Graphic Designer, Mrs Akosua Cudjoe, said she received a congratulatory card from her husband at the hospital, but was not sure if that could be classified as a "push gift".

She, however, said she later received gift items from the family of her husband a few days before the naming ceremony and explained that "traditionally, that was a "push gift" from the family for the arrival of the baby”.

A Gift Shop Owner at Adabraka in Accra, Miss Lexlena Annor, said a washing machine or blender could be a thoughtful gift, but could not be classified as "push gifts".

To her, “a push gift is a personal gift that only your wife can use. When you present her with a household item like a blender or freezer, everybody in the house gets to use it and so it ceases to be a personal gift”.

Appropriate “push gift”

In reaction, Dr Boakye said items such as blenders were not appropriate as “push gifts”, adding that such gifts must be personal, such as jewellery, perfume or cloth.

He said it was important for husbands or partners to find out what their wives wanted and honour them.

“You should know what your wife wants. A gift must stick in the mind.

Women like gifts that touch their hearts. Women are heart lovers and so things like perfume are good and men are hand lovers, so give a man with handy tools, like a mobile phone, a video game and not a shirt. He may not even wear it,” Dr Boakye explained.

However, he encouraged women who received items they did not like as “push gifts” to accept them with gratitude.

For women who have never received “push gifts” and wish to reclaim them, Dr Boakye said, it was not appropriate to ask for them, as the time had elapsed.