Watch your finances

An Akan axiom says “Sika ye mogya,” meaning money is blood. This shows that money is essential in all areas of life, especially in marriage, which is one of the most important human investments. 

Money is one thing that never seems to be enough. Couples argue over money regardless of how much they earn. 

Studies around the world indicate that financial issues are among the most serious marital problems. In about 15 per cent of marriages, couples argue over money several times a month.

In Ghana, money is often cited as a leading cause of marital breakdown.

Financial problems are not only about having too much or too little. Poverty and wealth both come with challenges.

The real causes of monetary conflict in relationships are wrong attitudes and poor management. Money reflects how couples relate to each other and even to God.

Why couples fight over money

Financial challenges often begin before marriage. Many parents do not intentionally teach their children how to manage money.

As a result, children grow up with different attitudes and motives about money.

Parental influence shapes whether one becomes a saver or a spender. Some people see money as power, others as adventure or self-worth.

Couples may, therefore, enter marriage with different financial goals.

Secrecy also creates problems in relationships. Many partners hide their earnings from each other, and in Ghana, a significant number of couples do not even know how much their spouses earn because trust is lacking.

This absence of transparency weakens relationships and often leads to conflict.

Some people enter marriage expecting their personal needs to be fully met by their partners.

Others view marriage as an opportunity to acquire property for themselves or their extended families. Such attitudes inevitably create tension.

Poor financial planning is another major challenge. Many couples fail to plan their finances or distinguish between needs and wants.

Society frequently measures the success of a marriage by material possessions, and as a result, some couples adopt lifestyles they cannot sustain. This can lead to debt and, ultimately, further conflict.

Reducing financial problems in marriage

It is important to be financially independent before marriage. It is unhealthy for one partner to meet all the needs of the other.

A partner who provides everything may attempt to exercise control, especially where one spouse depends entirely on the other.

Couples must discuss all matters concerning money. This includes attitudes toward savings, income levels and financial goals.

They must agree on who handles domestic bills and how finances will be managed in times of crisis.

There are three common financial systems. The first is the pooled system, where all income is placed into one account.

The second is the household contribution system, where each partner contributes a portion of income into a joint account for household expenses.

The third is the independent system, where couples maintain separate incomes and agree on specific expenses each will handle. In Ghana, it is common for husbands to provide “chop money” for household upkeep.

Any of these systems can work if there is honesty and transparency.

Drawing up a budget is necessary. A budget is a written plan of expected income and expenditure. It helps direct spending and prevents unnecessary expenses.

Planning reduces financial disputes by helping couples follow agreed-upon guidelines. It is advisable to save at least 10 per cent of income for short- and long-term plans.

Couples should also set aside funds to support church work and community development. The key principle is to live within one’s income.

Couples should also adopt practical saving measures. Buying in bulk can reduce costs. Cooking enough to last a few days saves time and money.

Avoid impulse buying. Ask whether a purchase is urgent, necessary or can wait. Do not buy something simply because it is cheap.

Supplementing income through part-time work, small trading, or gardening can also help.

A healthy attitude toward money is essential. Recognise that God is the source of provision. Earn money honestly, spend reasonably and invest carefully.

Avoid unnecessary debt. Practice contentment and willingly share with others.

Money can be a useful servant or a difficult master. It can create security or anxiety. Its effect on marriage depends on attitude and management, not on income level.

Couples must therefore take control of their money and not allow money to control their marriage.

Believe that prosperity is possible through honest work and wise decisions. Continue learning about financial management and work together to resolve financial issues.

See money as a tool to strengthen your marriage. When marriage and finances grow together, couples are better positioned to achieve realistic goals.

The advice remains simple: watch your finances in marriage.

 The writer is the Director of Eudoo Counselling Centre, West Legon. The centre offers, among other services, premarital counselling for couples preparing for marriage.