Good & Healthy Relationship Advice & Tips

How long is long enough before it is okay to have sex with your partner in relationship. Anyways, how long is long enough?

One of the most interesting aspect of this question, even in western societies, is that it is always almost exclusively directed at women. Perhaps, because women are often considered to be the gatekeepers of sex while men gate-keep commitment. Hence, the reason for the man to ask for the woman’s hand in marriage. In the complex world we live in where trust and sex are valuable social commodities, it is worth thinking about, if it is even relevant to ask this question, and what are the implications of our answers.

As you might expect, men are of the opinion that time is irrelevant. I have heard enough stories of people that met and got it on as soon as it was convenient, and they have gone on to get married. I have also heard of men that hung around for over a year for a hit and run. There are also tales of the knights that waited, and the quick smash and go.

My point is that there is no safe zone. You just have to weigh the situation and figure out what card to play. For a guy interested in other parts of a woman that aren’t sexual, I fail to see how having sex with him too early would change his entire opinion of you. And if it does, do you really want to get along with a man that shows such attitude towards women? Next thing he will ask is what your body count is. Of course, you know, to him any number not zero might as well be an exponential digit. 

Some ladies are of the opinion that a 90-day trial period without sex would be a great idea. For such with that school of thought, sex can cloud our judgment. I suppose there is some merit to that. Athough I think it actually opens up the true intentions of people; so really, it should clear your eyes. Perhaps, at a good price.

Most women, I believe should be better equipped to answer  and make a strong point about the demand for sex from men being too much. It just has to be regulated. Understandably, if it wasn’t, men would take the piss  which they always do.

Like most questions concerning emotional and social rules, there is no easy or “absolute” to this one, just circumstantial choices we would all have to make at some points. But what is life without discourse? So please, what do you think is better or safer? Wait it out, or get it out the way. The floor is yours.

Credit: Bella Naija