Is your lover reliable?
Last year, two fresh students met in one of our universities and immediately fell in love.
They were all over each other and earned nicknames in what appeared to be an exciting and fulfilling relationship.
However, few months into the relationship, when the woman contracted a strange disease, the man left her.
When she recovered, the man went back to apologise. She accepted him. Now she has a relapse and the man has gone missing again.
Sadly, the lady says she would take the man back anytime he wants her because she loves him! The fact remains that this man is unreliable.
Importance of reliability
The Free Dictionary by Farlex defined reliability in many ways: dependability, trustworthiness, honesty, responsible, sound, true, certain, safe, upright and reputable.
A reliable lover does a task that is expected or assigned to him or her. He or she puts great value on words.
You can therefore count on them to keep their word in all situations. He or she does what he or she says and refrains from whatever he or she said he or she wouldn’t do. They keep their promises and when they fail, they try to make up.
Reliability of a lover is a great virtue because it frees you from headaches. If your lover is reliable, you do not run around doing damage control.
You know that if you fall, your lover will lift you up. You know that when everyone is leaving your door your lover is the only one who enters to stand by you.
Reliability is an important factor in a relationship because you can never have a fulfilling relationship with someone you cannot be comfortable with.
Especially not with someone who cannot stand by his word and actions. A relationship with reliability but no love will stand the test of time but a relationship with lots of love but no reliability will fail. Reliability is therefore the cornerstone in a relationship.
Symptoms and dangers when a lover is not reliable
Your lover keeps assuring you that you are the only one he loves but you find him cheating over and over. He promises to visit but never comes or calls.
His time never adds up. You never truly know or understand each other because he keeps dark secrets. When you bring up the topic of marriage, he brushes it aside.
Your lover is always needy. He or she keeps asking for assistance with the promise to return the favour but never does. When you complain about a bad behaviour, they respond with anger, distraction and control.
He lets you down when you need him. You cannot nurture your relationship because you cannot make or agree on mutual decisions.
Can you rely on your lover?
Studies show that in 78 per cent of relationships where one or both partners are unreliable, the relationship is clinically dysfunctional.
This means lack of reliability may kill your relationship. You must therefore regularly take a close look at your relationship.
Trust your instinct and listen to the faint voice inside you. If your lover is unreliable, you must know it. Talk about it and help him or her to improve.
Each day, find something good your lover does and praise him or her for it. Your appreciation will motivate him to improve upon all areas of his life.
Most importantly, if you want your lover to be reliable, first be reliable because your positive actions will impact positively on your lover.
A relationship is like baking bread. Flour alone is not enough; you need many ingredients. In the same way love alone is not enough in your relationship. You need ingredients like reliability to have a fulfilling relationship.
Therefore, if after doing all you can to help your lover improve himself or herself and you do not see any healthy signs, take a bold step and leave the relationship before your lover leaves you when you need him or her most.
A lover who is not reliable simply puts you in prison. You can never win in prison. Move away from an unreliable lover and get into paradise.
Email: jydboakye@yahoo.com Mob. 0208181861
