Good & Healthy Relationship Advice & Tips

When two people first meet, it’s all about chemistry and passion. You don’t question if they have a savingsaccount or a good relationship with their family — it’s all about initial attraction.

However, if you’re looking for a life partner or are in the midst of a long-term relationship, this attraction, while important, may wane in comparison to a person’s bigger qualities and traits. When it comes to finding long-lasting love, people are looking for someone they can spend the rest of their life with — or at least the foreseeable future. With this outlook, a different set of qualities matter. These are some of the qualities and traits that can make you a more desirable partner.

1. You’re quick to move on

This is a big one. Fights will happen and when they do, it’s important to be quick to apologize and quick to forgive. If you always point the finger of blame and never take responsibility for your mistakes, your fights will drag on, leading to an unhappy partner. Likewise, if after every disagreement you spend hours being angry or pouty, even after apologies have been said, you’ll exhaust the relationship and the fight will only grow in size. Make an effort to apologize quickly and forgive easily. These two qualities will do wonders for a relationship.

2. You love yourself first

It can be tempting to throw yourself into a relationship and lose yourself. Unfortunately when you do, you’ll lose the individuality and confidence that may have attracted your partner to you in the first place. Give your significant other plenty of love, but always love yourself first. Nurture your passions — even if your partner has no interest in them — and spend time alone.

3. You’re honest

If trust is the foundation in a relationship then honesty is the trait that builds that trust. Being honest with your partner on all things allows them to be honest and vulnerable with you. Very little is more detrimental to a close relationship than dishonesty and deception. When you enter into a new relationship, start with complete honesty and maintain that level of truth throughout your partnership. A commitment to honesty, from both people, will make for a longer-lasting, happier relationship.

4. You can have fun

Sometimes a little humor can go a long way. Be silly and fun. Allow your inner nerd to come out and encourage your partner to dork-out along with you. Laughter is key to any relationship and it creates a bond (and inside jokes) that only the two of you share. Not only will having a good sense of humor ensure you and your partner have a good time together, but it may be what keeps you afloat when life gets difficult.

5. You’re willing to grow

When you first met your partner, you may have both loved the Grateful Dead, Italian food, and soccer, but that doesn’t mean these passions can’t change and evolve. Encourage your partner’s personal growth and be open to your own. Things will change, and if you can be flexible and open about your significant other’s sudden interest in skateboarding or French culture, it will go a long way in maintaining an open and successful relationship.

6. You challenge them

Part of what makes a couple successful is their ability to challenge each other. If your partner feels like you’re dragging them down, the relationship won’t last long. It’s important to be paired in a way that encourages growth from both parties. Maybe your knowledge of the art world inspires your partner, or the fact that you’re hardworking and ambitious inspires them to also work toward their own goals. It’s important to not only grow and learn from a relationship, but to be able to offer that quality to your partner in return.