Good & Healthy Relationship Advice & Tips

The article ‘will you donate a sperm’ which appeared in The Mirror two weeks ago got a huge response. Even though the only aim of the article was to debate sperm donation, many saw it as an advertisement.

Hundreds of calls, mails and WhatApp messages came in and some are still making contacts. Never in my 10-year history as a columnist for this paper has a single article generated so much interest.

When the respondents were sampled randomly and asked if they understood the implications of sperm donation almost everybody answered in the negative.

When asked why they wanted to do it, everybody said it was about money. This is not surprising. Today, most Ghanaians are ‘wild’ and think everything is about money.

Significance of money

The Akans say money is the blood of life. This is because money is essential in all we do. It provides the necessities of life such as health, shelter and food.

We use money to buy goods and pay for services. Money gives you stability, security, self-esteem, identity and power.  Even when we are reluctant to put a price tag on love, the reality is that being in love comes with a cost.

On the other hand, the love of money is the root of all evil. It has turned many lives into turmoil and created anxiety, anger and depression. Monetary problems will affect everything about you.

In Ghana, money is the leading cause of conflicts and divorce.

Money and relationship

A popular Ghanaian music says ‘emaa pe sika’ or women love money. This is because money or the ability to provide financial needs is the most important thing most women look for in a man because for women, money is an important medium of security.

Rich people, therefore, tend to get beautiful women. Many women walk over rough diamonds because they look for wrong things in relationships.

Some men also think if you have money, you can win almost any woman to bed if you can ‘spray’ or ‘spoil’ her enough.  Many men, therefore, would do anything to get money so that they can show women how ‘loaded’ they are.

In Ghana, most people do not care how one makes his money. If you are ‘loaded’, you are respected and women will fall for you.

Is money everything in life?

Two weeks ago, thieves broke into my bedroom and took away everything that was handy and valuable – computers, mobile phones, tablets, jewellery and money.

How they managed to get  on the first floor at about 2a.m, enter the glass window  to my bedroom and obviously had time to ransack and pick items in hidden places and some inches away from my head without me hearing or seeing anything baffles me.

The thieves were prepared to risk their lives for money because they think money is everything.

Money is not everything in life and relationships. It is only a vehicle to enhance love. 

It can buy you attraction, lust, infatuation and even sex but true love is not a commodity.  Money no matter how “loaded” you are, can’t buy you true love.

In business we say may the buyer be warned!  Anyone whose loyalty you can buy will let you down if your money gets finished or a higher bidder comes.

You need a positive attitude about money to make it useful in your relationship. Believe God is the owner and source of all your supplies and that He wants you to prosper.

Work hard and gain money. Be content with what you have and live a life of sharing.

Let money be your servant in your relationship but not everything in life.

Email jydboakye01@gamail.com. The writer is the director of Eudoo Counselling centre, west legon. He is also the author of ‘Your guide to marriage’, ‘Love unlimited’ and ‘The journey of love’.

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